Date Yourself

Dating yourself is about taking the time to know yourself and to be comfortable in your own company. It's about treating yourself with the same kindness, love, and attention you would give to a partner. It's so easy to get caught up in the hustle and bustle of our daily lives. We are constantly connected to others through social media and technology, so it's easy to forget about ourselves.

Why is it so important?

It allows you to discover who you truly are. We forget to take a step back and reflect on ourselves. Dating yourself allows you to slow down and focus on your own needs. Allows you to explore your own interests and passions, without external influences.

It also helps in building self-confidence and self-worth. When you take the time to pamper and treat yourself, you can boost your self-esteem, and help you become more comfortable in your own skin. As the saying goes 'If you can't love yourself, how can you expect someone else to love you'.
When I first heard that I laughed. For years I never thought I was worthy, I couldn't look at myself in the mirror for years without crying, finding something I hated and where did that get me...unhappiness and many toxic relationships with not just men but with myself. Forward to today, I make the time to listen to my body, and what it needs and truly look after myself. I look in the mirror and think 'damn you did a good job today Kat'. That little bit of self-encouragement goes a long way. My younger self never thought my future self would be happy, and here we are!

Another benefit is it allows you to be more independent and self-reliant. When you are constantly seeking validation and companionship from others, it can be easy to lose sight of your own capabilities. You trust in your own abilities to make yourself happy, which can lead to a more fulfilling life.

So how exactly do we go about dating ourselves?
  • Set aside a day or an evening each week to do something that you truly enjoy. It could be anything from reading a book, indulging in a spa day, trying out a new hobby, or simply going for a walk. The key is to focus on yourself. 

  • Be mindful. Resist the urge to go on social media. Trust me, I know it's hard but once your focus is on something else you won't even give it a thought. Use the time to reflect on your thoughts. What are your goals? What makes you happy? What do you need in your life right now?

  • Be kind and gentle with yourself. It's not about pushing yourself to be perfect or achieving certain goals. I'm a big believer that your world is your oyster, it's yours to make it how you want. There is no right time for anything, so never think you're behind just because someone else has already achieved something. Embrace your flaws and imperfections, and celebrate your strengths. 

  • Set boundaries. You know yourself better than anyone else. You know what line can't be crossed, you know how far you can go so you set the boundaries. Learn to say no, this is soooo hard, I've always been a 'yes' gal but my goodness when you start saying 'no', it feels so good to be the one in control. Don't overextend yourself just to please others, because how is this pleasing you (unless it does but even so, you know what's best for you)

  • Surround yourself with positivity. You don't want to be around people who only drag you down with them. Delete those negative people on social media and wave goodbye to those around you. You want to surround yourself with those who uplift and support you and value you for who you are. You know you're with the right people when you don't have to pretend to be someone else, you can embrace yourself for who you are.

  • Nourish your body. It's super simple but very important. I didn't look after my body for years, and I noticed the impact it had, I was always tired which then affected my mood. I'm not saying go on a diet but do include nutritious food, stay hydrated, and try and get enough sleep. You'll soon notice a difference. Better skin, better mood, and a healthier, happier you.

Self-love and care will always be ongoing, it's not something that you do for one week or month. Always find the time for yourself, you are your priority. It's a journey of self-discovery, and it allows you to become more in tune with yourself. You deserve to be happy. It will be the best date you ever go on, trust me.

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